speak: the notes

THEMES
ALIENATION AS A FORM OF SELF-PROTECTION
Melinda Sordino, through no fault of her own, feels alienated from her peers. She furthers this problem by closing herself off from her closest friends and her parents. Her physical appearance does not invite approach by any except the somewhat clueless Heather who has no previous knowledge of Melinda or her life. Another method she uses to alienate herself is to hide in her secret closet thus physically and psychologically giving herself a safe haven.

THE PAINFULNESS OF GROWING UP
Melinda is an unusual character in that she doesn’t do much to alleviate the painfulness of growing up. She was introduced to the painfulness in the harshest of ways, but she has shut herself off from others and, as a result, the pain is increased many times.
When her parents give her pastels and a drawing pad she nearly speaks up, but then she retreats to the safety of her silence. She never says anything about the summer party to her friends, her parents or to Heather.
As the novel progresses, she begins to heal and communicate, but her initial communications are rebuffed. She works through the pain and by novel’s end leaves us with the belief that the worst is over.

DISTRUST OF ADULTS
Melinda exhibits a basic distrust of the adults who can help her: parents, guidance counselors, therapists, teachers (except Mr. Freeman. Even Mr. Freeman is not privy to Melinda’s secret. However, he is trusted more than the others and he does detect the pain in Melinda).
This distrust is the impetus for remaining silent even with friends. If she shares this pain with her friends, how long before her parents find out and the judgment begins?
The world is not as simple as Melinda would like it to be and thus she must eventually share her secret with others.

MOTIFS
Motifs are recurring structures, contrasts, and literary devices that can help to develop and inform the text’s major themes
LONELINESS
Melinda’s loneliness, a more concrete manifestation of her alienation problem, is a driving force throughout the book. Much of the novel describes her need for companionship even as she befriends Heather. While her behavior indicates loneliness, Melinda fails to embark on the one course of action that could end her loneliness and isolation: speaking.


MIRROR
Melinda uses mirrors a few times in the novel. At first, her reflection appalls her as she gazes at her mouth and awkward body. She has a mirror in her closet-hideout at school which she covers with a poster of Maya Angelou. This mirror helps her at the end of the novel and is part of her recovery. The mirror at Effert’s slices her into hundreds of Melindas-reminiscent of Picasso’s cubist paintings.
APPEARANCE
Melinda is concerned about her appearance at several points in the novel. She regularly notes her scabby lips, the blood that falls when she bites through her lips, peels skin from a finger or uses the edge of a paper clip to cut herself.
She notes the changes in her body are not always for the better; that her hair seems to need washing at unexpected moments, and that shopping for clothes is an unpleasant task because of all this.
Her awareness of this situation is actually positive since it denotes a longing for a proper self-image.

RELATIONSHIPS, INTIMACY AND LOVE
Relationships, intimacy, and sexuality are also recurring motifs relating to the larger theme of alienation. Melinda fears closeness with boys because of the rape she suffered. She thinks David Petrakis is cute but shies away when he asks her over for pizza. Two parts of her personality battle over whether or not she should have accepted the invitation.
LYING AND DECEPTION
Melinda leads a double life internally and externally, lying to herself and to the world. She realizes that she needs help and even seeks help in a cursory way by visiting a hospital, but she never truly acts with intent to find a cure. Externally, no one knows of her hiding place or the secret she carries within her. Her friendship with Heather is mostly for others to see her as a normal girl and maybe even to convince herself of that.


Symbols
Symbols are objects, characters, figures, and colors used to represent abstract ideas or concepts.

TREE
The most obvious symbol in the novel is the tree that Melinda must turn into art for Mr. Freeman’s class. The tree is a symbol of Melissa herself. As Melinda gains strength her trees show life replete with flaws and imperfections. Her final tree is her masterpiece, symbol of her new found strength and recovery.

CLOSET
The abandoned janitor’s closet becomes an accessory to Melinda’s deceptions. She decorates it with her artwork, afraid to show her inner feelings anywhere else. As she strengthens, Melinda abandons the closet. Ironically, the closet that represents her deception and fear is the scene of her greatest triumph as she fights off her rapist and exposes him for the criminal he is.